It’s been so long since I have posted, I miss you all very much!
Well, it’s the New Year now. I survived the holidays, as single as I was, it happened and it wasn’t as awful as I made it out to be. NYE celebration on the other hand was a little harder for me to deal with.
But now it is officially the New Year. A fresh start, a year for me. To be honest, I am nervous for this New Year, I think I have finally almost accepted moving on and making efforts to lose hope in my ex and I. I am trying to come to terms with it, as it has been four months, but I just want to be done. The first thing I did today when I woke up was schedule a session with my therapist. I thought it to be silly to still be seeing her, I took a few weeks off, but I soon realize I still find it necessary. Goodness am I thankful for her in 2013.
This is a year for me, my accomplishments and success. My goal this year honestly, is to stay single for the year, but whatever is meant to is meant to be. I am getting back into school in a few weeks, I am quitting my miserable job and finding a new one and my coaching season is drawing nearer and nearer. I have plans to join crossfit, something I have been wanting to do in the last year, and moving back to the cities! I am more than ecstatic about these plans this year.
Looking back on 2013 is so very bittersweet, the last half of it was the biggest battle I have encountered thus far in my life. And some days I am still fighting and struggling and that is okay. My ex is still always in the back of my head, as of lately a lot more frequent. I can’t wait for the day that I she isn’t on my mind. I found out she is New York interviewing for jobs for a week right now, this gave me a little anxiety for some reason. It’s like she really is going to be out of my life for good. I kept telling myself the cliche saying all my friends and therapist tell me, “if it is meant to be, it will be.” Along with that cliche saying, I also keep reminding myself to take things day by day. This especially pertains to my dog. I think his final fate gives me the most worry in my future, but for now and today he is with me, that is what matters at the moment.
Through this struggle, all my friendships have grown stronger and I myself as an individual is stronger than ever. I am an even better version of me. I have found balance, peace and love within myself. I can truly say this for the first time in my life, I am proud of that. I do wish to be in a relationship again someday, and whoever that is they are damn lucky to have me,
I am so lucky to have met you wonderful people here on wordpress, to find such a community that has been supportive has truly been wonderful. Thank you friends for being there, you know who you are.
To you and myself, here is to better days in 2014!